Pre-Game: No Graffanino, no Youkilis, no Kapler, no Miller, no Mantei, a banged up Damon and Wells, a sick, injured and recovering Trot Nixon, a recovering Bradford, a recovering and ineffective Schilling and Foulke, a tired Varitek, an underachieving Renteria, an overworked Timlin and Myers, an ineffective and released Embree, Halama and Bellhorn, an ineffective but retained Kevin Millar, a disgruntled and traded Payton and Vazquez, a beaned Clement, a distracted Arroyo and Manny, the worst third base coach in baseball, a horrific first-half schedule, followed by a 30-games-in-30-days stretch during the pennant race...
...And a half-game lead. Keep all that in mind folks...
Top 1st - Lead-off single, from the best pure lead-off man in baseball. It's been a pleasure watching you, Johnny, even if you do go Hollywood in the off-season...
Papi, Papi, Papi, Papi!!!!! 2-0 Sox. Give him the MVP. NOW! I especially love the fact that he pounded that shot just as the famous leather-lunged D-Rays fan started yelling at him...
Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny!!! 3-0 Sox.
Middle 1st - By the way, Bruce Froemming is calling balls and strikes tonight, and he can barely squat down behind the catcher. Major League Baseball should be ashamed of themselves for allowing such a ridiculously corpulent umpire to call games. He looks like he's about to have a John McSherry moment...Bottom 1st - Okay Schill, the hitters staked you to a lead. Now show us something...
One...
Two...
Oops. So much for that little theme. Long bomb for Jorge "I can't see anything with my helmet this low" Cantu, except, of course, that thigh-high cut fastball...
Well, Schilling came back well. He looks to have better command tonight...
Bottom 2nd - Oh yeah, Curt seems to have the goods tonight. He just made Joey Gathright look like a child...
Top 3rd - PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI, PAPI!!!!!!! 5-1 Sox. How can anyone argue that this guy isn't the MVP?
Boom, Trot Nixon gets well. 7-1 Sox. Farewell, Mr. McClung. It's been a genuine pleasure seeing you this year...
Ah, the notorious Dewon Brazelton, a.k.a. The Man Who Could Not Be Suspended. A single from The Captain welcomes you...
Bottom 3rd - In all seriousness, this Tampa Bay team isn't all that far away from being a contender. They have as much young talent in the lineup as anyone, they just lack the will to spend some of it to fill their pitching holes. I wonder if anyone has ever bothered to tell Chuck LaMar that you can't play eight outfielders at the same time.
Wow. A two-base sacrifice fly. I haven't seen that since the days of Willie Wilson. Someone needs to tell the Sox defenders that speed kills. Really, really lazy play all around. Schilling should be pissed...
Top 4th - Papi and Manny are now 6-for-6 tonight. They could keep that up the rest of the year. Really, I won't mind...
And now Trot looks to be heating up. Another hit, another run, 8-2 Sox. It must have been a particularly satisfying hit for Nixon, coming off Brazelton, his sparring partner from the April donnybrook that saw them both suspended...
And now The Captain has three, 9-2 Sox. The 3-4-5-6 hitters for the Sox are now 11-for-12. Good Lord. And before I could finish typing this, Olerud knocked in the 10th run. Boy, did we need a night like this...
Bottom 4th - One, two, three for Schill. If not for that funky two-bag sac fly, his line would look great tonight...
Top 5th - Um, someone on the Tampa pitching staff might actually die tonight. Everyone they bring in has already been figuratively killed, why not go for literally? Another homer for Manny, that's five for the club tonight. 12-2 Sox. Manny and Papi are both 4-for-4. Trot just tripled, so now he just needs a double for the cycle. And here comes Tek, who is also 3-for-3....
Make that 4-for4. 13-2 Sox. That foursome is now 15-for-16 tonight. Unreal...
Bottom 5th, etc. - You'll have to pardon me for the rest of the game if I don't keep tabs quite as closely as I normally would. This one is a laugher. All that remains to be seen is:
1. Will Papi, Manny or Tek gor 5-for-5?
2. Will Trot hit for the cycle?
3. Will Schilling finish strong?
4. Will we see the utterly electric Craig Hansen again?
We shall see...
Well, we have our answers...
1. No, no and no.
2. Nope, but he did get his fourth hit.
3. Oh yeah. Seven innings, 2 runs (one of them not his fault), one walk, seven K's. Choice.
4. Nope, but that's smart. The kid had a case of dead arm just a couple of weeks ago. No need to push him out there in a blow out.
We got to see Hanley Ramirez's major league debut. I'll say this - he looks like a ballplayer. Smooth in the field, good eye at the plate, decent stroke. He would have walked in his first plate appearance, but that fat ass Bruce Froemming rang him up on a clearly blown check swing call. Bastard.
Pretty much a perfect game, if not for a couple of bonehead defensive plays. And the running diary comes through again.
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